Landing A Good Man: Be A “Banquet Girl”!
by Olie Lookoe
If you’re a woman and you’re attractive….you already probably know how to handle men. However, I see a lot of women becoming what I’ve recently referred to as “soup kitchen girls”.
A soup kitchen girl is a woman who foolishly takes whatever scraps a man throws her. She may tolerate him being late for dates. She may tolerate him “dating” other women at the same time. She may even adjust her life to meet his needs.
*LR smacks head on desk*
Oh, ladies. You may as well shoot yourself in both feet and wear a sign that says “I’m predictable! I have low self-esteem! I lack mystery and sexiness!”
Obviously, that means you’re going to get dumped or get stuck with the “bad seeds”. This is what a “soup kitchen girl” gets stuck with. She sets herself up for failure by telling a man all her secrets when the truth is that NO woman should ever let a man know more then 50% about her. He should always wonder what she does in the shower……wonder where she is on weekdays when she’s not with him…..and know that there are tons of suitors who are probably vying for her attention when he’s not around.
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He knows that she has high expectations of him and that she will leave him with no pomp and circumstance (no yelling, no arguments, no nagging). She doesn’t have to nag him. He’s already been told.
A woman should always consider herself the prize and the princess. If you are attractive, intelligent, and sexy then you need to have the self-esteem of a woman who bears those traits. She doesn’t settle for less then the best and she knows that “settling” will extinguish her youth, ruin her chances for a better man, and limit her dating pool to insecure types of men on top of it!
Every girl should be a “banquet girl”. Or a princess, if you prefer. This is the type of woman I’ve just described. She is exactly what she sounds like…..she sees the dating world as full of men. A banquet for her.
She has total confidence and is able to give BACK exactly what she requires. She has standards that are unwavering and her own personal “rules”. She’s dignified and graceful. She never tolerates disrespectful language or behavior toward her. Scuzzy men don’t bother with women who have high standards. They don’t bother with intelligent or desirable women. They are too insecure to compete/handle them.
That’s good for us, ladies! By upping your standards in a man, you are weeding out the “would-be douchebags” because they know they aren’t going to be able to offer anything you don’t already have yourself.
A man shows he is truly interested in you by:
1. Paying for dates. A man who does not pay for dates and want to “court you” properly before becoming emotionally/sexually intimate is NOT a man who has any real interest in you. You aren’t worth his time nor his money. So why should he be worth the large chunk out of your day that could have been spent with a better man? You wouldn’t!
2. He is a “hero” type. This means a man who protects all women, children, and even other men. He’d never harm an innocent person and he’d never abuse anyone, but he would efficiently murder and destroy anyone who disrespected his woman, his children, or his loved ones. He’s a White Knight, a hero, and a man.
3. He has manners. A man who likes you doesn’t forget to open doors and pull out your chair. He would never be so crass as to pull up in front of your house and honk the horn. He was raised better then that. He knows to park the car, walk up to the door, and knock properly. He knows to carry heavy things, defend your honor, and loves you too much to allow anyone to speak ill of you. He defends good and punishes evil. He’s a hero and a vigilante at the same time.
4. He wants to see you on primarily “weekends” (or whatever his “off” time is from work). A man who only wants to see you on a Tuesday or Thursday, but is missing on the weekends is a man who is likely a cheater, a player, or a liar. He’s hiding something. You’re not his “one and only” and you’re not #1. So why would you want to date him? Should you ever have to compete with other women for his attention? No. You’re the best and you demand the best in return.
5. He cannot be distracted by OTHER women when he’s with you. A man who truly cares for you doesn’t have eyes for anyone but you. He may “look” on occasion as we all do…..but he has *again* the manners to never disrespect you by looking at other women when you’re around. He knows better.
6. He wants you to come to family events often. A man who is good father/husband/LTR potential also loves family. He adores children and he also respects women. He loves his mother and speaks to her with respect (the way a man treats his mother IS the way he will treat you). He is not a man likely to run out on his family/wife/friends when times get tough.
7. He is friends with his exes. LADIES THIS IS A HUGE ONE! A man that has mostly other dudes as his friends should be a huge warning signal to you. If he does not talk to his exes at least on occasion and rarely mentions them, he’s hiding a past of bad relationships and is more likely to be too immature to handle a normal adult relationship. Nothing says “run” like a man who seems to always be attending “sausage parties” (so to speak)
Now this may seem scatter-gun since every man and woman are different. But if you’re a lady of quality and you are able to give back what you are requiring in a man (meaning if you’re going to be a rude, immature, cheater yourself you really have no business making any of the above demands).
A woman is measured by her beauty, her intelligence, and her character. Discipline and self-control should be the two key points that you are focusing on in yourself and also in the men you date. A man with discipline does not have to be coddled, nagged, or “watched”. You can trust him.
The same goes for women with discipline and self-control. You don’t have to coddle her, nag her, or watch her, either. She has a built in discipline that is part of her character.
If you are a woman of character yourself, then my above list is a good way to find like minds (in men). If you care more about the adventure or the ups and downs and of dating, these types of men may not be your speed.
But if you’re looking for a guy who will be loyal to you, make you proud around family, and still looks like a hot piece of ass on your arm…..you want to look for discipline and self-control at their core.
When you require these things, you ensure you are a “banquet girl” and never a “soup kitchen” girl. You are also ensuring you will have good and happy relationship more often then not. You will likely be the one to find real love, when others do not. And last I checked….that’s all anyone really wants, anyway isn’t it?
